Showing posts with label family values. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family values. Show all posts

Friday, January 20, 2012

begging!

This is wht happens when begging runs in the family !!
:)

Friday, January 8, 2010

love or arranged???


Talking of love marriage or arranged marriage??which is better.. there has been lot of debates..on this issue..talking to one of my friends Kate yesterday..who asked me ..how did I meet my hubby??? when I told her about arranged marriage she started asking me all kinds of questions ..as to her it was kinda ..something new.. being a Chinese female ..this concept was new to her..
Kate.. who is twenty one years old ,married a Chinese guy of thirty eight years,as she told me and they met each other on a street ..as he lived a block away from her house.. ...they came to US..later as both of them come from a poor family and US was a boon for them ... they now run a salon and can afford all which they never thought of would be in their native place..
I asked Kate ..why did she marry an older guy .. if it was a kinda street love?;).. as Kate is a beautiful gurl and Steven her husband is kind of not so good ..looking guy.. ..she said ,love is Blind.. Well... I have no answer to that..!!!
talking of love marriage ..where marriage as per our own choice and we know exactly whats coming inn ,we cannot blame parents and have a fair chance to know a person better ..and even in a way to go ahead or not..
When two people are in love, they are at their best to impress the other person.they are at their best behaviour and project a lot of things that they are actually not. Our society is structured that way we are expected to be polite in public. It takes a while between couples to shed the veil. Most of the time, even after going out for a few years, when we actually live together, we are in for surprises. ...
Considering issue of love marriage where the couples .... who have solemnized love marriage would have to tackle all their crises on their own, because they might have been separated from their family. Resentment drives the parents and the relatives to remain dormant in case the married couple wants any financial or moral support - a common sight seen in love marriages in India. Due to this factor, many people do not want to marry without their parent's consent, because they would be ultimately cut off from the family ties.... Talking of arranged marriage where success rate of marriage is more compared to love marriage as there is strong support of parents and any kinda problem ..the whole family is ready to solve the matter....and put the couple back... ..... .... It is said that compromise is a factor that decides whether the marriage would work out or not. In case of love marriage, people might expect more from their partner, largely because they have fallen in love before marriage. This leads to lesser compromises, as the person expects more from his/her partner.... On the other hand, compromise and adjustments forms the foundation of arranged marriage, largely because the married couple does not have any preconceived notions or expectations from one another. The compromise factor might work wonders in case of most of the arranged marriages, while in love marriages, that might prove to be yet another cause for altercation. Due to this factor, people consider arranged marriage as long lasting and better than love marriage. ....Statistics place the divorce rate for arranged marriages much lower than those in the United States, where marriages out of love are the rule.....However, research also shows that the pressure a married couple encounters from both society as a whole, and from the respective families, suggests that divorce is often not an option..... Most of the time out of peer pressure ..or influence of friends, people are lured and want to get into pitfall..When I was studying in Punjab university Chandigarh.. gurls ended up having affairs and get into marriage leaving their studies .. as love was predominant factor at that age... Bollywood movies ..makes every gurl dream of prince which gets them into love marriage....
Being a very liberal person... to me a good family and a nice person is more important whether its love or arranged marriage... basically what matters is love and respect for each other... which comes from family values.. what we are ,will be taught to our kids... as it will be passed over to generations... ..I always defy divorces which are very common due to lack of respect and trust... ...
.....I was at store ..shopping as usual.. I heard an
argument and turned back to see.. a guy yelling at his wife ..with all sorts of names ,an American female.. I assume that was her Ex-husband .. she was in tears..in front of everyone ..and then from her cell ..called 911(police) ... the guy.. slammed the door and ran..away... I think when thay took the vows ..it was all lovey dovey.. but.. now the situation was in front of the whole world..basically infatuation or attraction gets blurred ..after a while... Its only love , respect and trust ..that counts.. ...in any kind of marriage!!!!
LOVE OR ARRAN
GED